jones

For you negatives, I need no vigor to in print.
With a million excuses in my brain, I cave in.
All my positives need robustness, assertion, and belief.
It is a war between habit and thought for a cure and comfort.

Feeble are my concentrations against you,
Always in desire for you.
In my pondering you summon,
That we are betrothed.
A norm wanna be a persona.

In your company, I think I blossom,
If we are not bonded, my body is not mine.
My nerves are without purpose.
I cannot taste, feel, see or listen.
You are a persistent, nagging want.

It’s all pleasure with you in me.
I give you my all, will and power.
I am a servant to a substance,
I don’t care for anything but you.

You have shivered my dreams.
You have broken my family.
Destroyed my path and profession.
I let down my Jesus for you.

A tinny glimpse of me says,
You are not desirable, a need not to be desired,
My system can be optimized without you.
I cannot live two lives.
I can own myself, I’m strong

Was I born fixated on you?
Where did I lose myself to you?
I’m so selfish when I have to choose you.
Can my life be better?
I need to believe in myself.

You are not my god.
You are not my identity.
You do not have control over me.
I am the image of God.

I have switched Him for you.
But not again, not anymore.
I desire fullness that only God can give.
I desire a constant love that you cannot give.
I am over these moments of pleasure.

I believe am not alone.
I Am not depressed.
I am over my guilt.
I Am going to Christ.
Not to you.

Your chains and pains are broken.
My love to live is fulfilled.
My purpose is found.
My life has meaning.
Not in you but in Christ.